DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have a number of food allergies. I can manage them when dining at home, and even in some restaurants, where I can choose what I can handle and request “leave-outs.” But dining at other people’s homes is a challenge.

If a host/hostess announces their menu ahead of time, and I can tell there’s nothing I can eat, what do I do? Go, but take small portions and pretend to eat, possibly asking a neighboring diner to eat what I can’t?

Not go at all, even though I’d like to see them? Or tell them I’d love to come, but will need to bring my own fare, as delicious as theirs sounds? Please help. I’m discombobulated.

GENTLE READER: Allergies (not mere preferences) are legitimate things to mention to a dinner host, even if unsolicited. The inconvenience of rearranging a menu, M

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