How to Do It is Slate’s sex advice column. Have a question? Send it to Jessica and Rich here . It’s anonymous!

Dear How to Do It,

I’m a 41-year-old man and have an uncorrected birth defect…

I have hypospadias (an unformed urethra basically), which causes my penis to bend at a near 90-degree angle when erect. Functionally, it is fine (have to pee sitting down … whatever). I have, however, struggled with body image issues over this and have never been in a relationship or had sex (as of yet). Any advice for discussing this with a potential partner or positions to try if the day ever comes?

—Curved and Curious

Dear Curved and Curious,

A nearly 90-degree bend is significant. I emailed a few questions to Prof. Dr. Ahmed T. Hadidi of Germany’s Hypospadias Center, and

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