Care and Feeding is Slate’s parenting advice column. Have a question for Care and Feeding? Submit it here .

Dear Care and Feeding,

My parents had a messy relationship my whole life, so I was relieved when they divorced this past January. What was shocking was my dad remarrying as soon as the divorce went through, and who it was he married: one of my former high school classmates, a now-24-year-old woman. She’s younger than I am.

Because I’m close to the rest of my dad’s family, seeing them is unavoidable. When I do, I keep it polite, but I think my dad is gross, and I think she’s in it mostly for the financial stability he provides. My husband, of course, knows how I feel. Recently, he taught our toddler that my dad and his wife are to be called “Grandpa” and “Grandma.” When

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