BOULDER, CO - According to sources, local high-school senior and avowed radical communist Kazden McChitterly is "a bit unsettled" after discovering the hammer and sickle from the insignia he proudly wears on his t-shirts and knit hats represents hard physical labor.

"Wait-- that's an actual hammer? Like the kind you swing?" said McChitterly nervously. "Like-- you have to use it while doing really difficult work? I don't know about this."

Witnesses say he grew even more uncomfortable when he found out about the sickle. "I thought it was just a weapon used to gloriously cut down our capitalist foes!" he exclaimed after discovering it was actually used to gather grain for the government during 20-hour workdays in the bitter cold.

"I'm not sure about this communism thing anymore," he said.

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