Why We Talk: Most Speech Influences Rather Than Informs

Key points

Speech is unreliable as an indicator of what really happened.

Speech is an excellent indicator of the speaker's self-experience and appraisal of the listener.

Good therapists focus on what the patient is up to in choosing what to speak about.

Very little of what we say to other people is designed to inform them about something. Instead, we speak to have an effect on them. For example, a suspect needs an alibi, and a witness tells the police they spent the entire evening together. The witness may not be providing factual information about the suspect’s whereabouts. Instead, the statement communicates that the witness thinks the suspect is innocent. Conversely, if they did spend the evening together but the witness thinks the suspect is guilty, the witness may tell the police