What it's like in Britain, by a MAGA American who's never been

By Joe Turner III, swamp boat operator

AS a proud resident of Alabama who has never even visited New York, I’m an expert on the hellish lives of UK residents. Let me tell you Brits about it:

Sadiq Khan is your King

The monarchy was usurped shortly after Trump’s visit. Charles is in the Tower of London now, with the ravens and his brother. Khan rules London as King on a throne made of Christian bones. From it he orders his E-bike gangs to snatch celebrity Rolexes. He wears ten on each arm and pretends his arms are made of gold.

Christianity is illegal and so is Christmas

If you say ‘Merry Christmas’ in Britain? You’ll be imprisoned, same as if you dare tweet support for Trump which is why they don’t. They actually have huge Christmas jails, policed by armed asylum seekers. One time thi