Pay Dirt is Slate’s money advice column. Have a question? Send it to Kristin and Ilyce here . (It’s anonymous!)

Dear Pay Dirt,

I have been estranged from my brother for years because of his constant attempts to bleed me dry. He is a financial mess and always has a flash in the pan get rich scheme. His lies ended my engagement when he convinced my fiancé to cosign a loan that my brother automatically defaulted on—and then laughed when asked for the money back. According to him, he was innocent, and I was a fool for paying my ex back out of my savings.

His irresponsibility didn’t end there. He had two boys with a woman that already lost her first child to CPS. Then when she got prison time for assault, he dumped the boys with our mother. The boys bounced between their grandmo

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