Why it's perfectly legal that my genitals are registered as a shell corporation in the British Virgin Islands, by Nigel Farage

YES, the Farage Jewels are for tax purposes divested from the rest of the Farage body. Yes, they are registered offshore. Yes, ownership is opaque. Here’s why that’s fine.

You see, my meat-and-two-veg – and I don’t care if calling them that offends the trans lobby – are a national asset. But, employed as they have largely been in servicing my Irish and German wives and my French partner, they have acquired an international hue.

Therefore I have to say they balk when subject to British taxation, which is absurdly high on proven wealth creators such as my old man downstairs. When that tax then goes to MoD diversity consultants, there’s a very real danger of dysfunction.

That’s why I made the decision to relocate my pud for tax reasons. Please note I did not choose Monaco but the British V